aliarose

So I finally come back here and it's to throw a bitch fit.

Fuck you, seriously. I let you stay with me, then I let you move into my old room at my parents' house because I don't want you to go anywhere.. and you don't even say thank you? Jesus fucking christ.

So, hello LJ. It's been a while, I've been really quite distracted this year I guess. First of all, putting it out there to the internet.. Over a month or so ago, me and Sebastiaan broke up. I think it was for the better in the end, we've both learnt a lot and now we both have room to grow and better ourselves.
It certainly hasn't been easy either, but I think I'm okay. Here's what's been up the past day or so;
He moved out yesterday, and I can tell you right now I'll probably spend a lot of nights in bed crying over everything. I was not at home when this happened (I was out at Rarakie's housewarming party surrounded by wonderful friends/people) so I was distracted and happy enough. Still a lot on my mind though, but that's to be expected. Towards the end I just felt so weighed down though, and I really couldn't be around people because I sort of just needed to go and sort myself out.

When I got home, and stepped into my room to see that everything familar was gone... I just burst out in tears, it was absolutely terrible. So I've been here since, trying to figure out where to put things.. Even though I damn well KNOW where they all go.. It's just hard. It was all a case of too much too fast, but I think we really do need to take that step back. I have lived with him for over a year now, and habits don't like to go down easy. I'm going to miss his companionship a lot, but I think it's time for me to be my own person again, even if it's hurting right now.

The thing I hate the most is he's going back to a place I tried so hard to get him out of. I don't know if it's about loyalties or priorities, but either way I feel utterly betrayed. Even though I technically was the one to call it off. But anyway..

I'm not going to drag this on and make too much of a scene, and rest assured, I am perfectly okay! He will be okay too, and we're still going to be friends, so no worries about that.

Last but not least, a BIG thanks to my two best friends as well, I'd be lost without you guys <3

SO HI. Okay not much has happened since I last wrote here. I've finished course, left two weeks early even, and still graduated. XD
I have blue in my hair now, but that's old news. I also got snakebites today. Holy fuck, it didn't hurt NEARLY as much as I thought it would! I'm surprised. XD; I was still extremely nervous and anxious though. I didn't cry though. Or pass out... like my friend who was there did. XD Poor guy.
Drinking is all good. Eating I'm still working on. I'll get used to it. It doesn't hurt much, either. Just that annoying dull achey pain.

My wolf fursuit has also sold more or less, so I'm very very pleased with this.
So till I have anything better and/or meaningful to write... Onwards with life~

Somewhat. Just chilling along. Waiting for a quiet weekend, which I won't have until... What, 2-3 more weekends? FFFFFFFFFFFF!
Man, my posts are getting SO BORING. I don't know what to wrtite about, because I know nobody would be interested in my silly school dramas. :3

Sorry I haven't updated in a while, but this morning I shall take a few minutes to do so! Not much taking up my life other than course at the moment, which afterwards they should hopefully put me into a job. It's hospitality, but I don't really care. I'm going to be doing something else in July anyway.
The actual course is pretty fun so far! People are nice (maybe too nice, this guy bought me a sammich o_O), and it's easy going. Soon-ish I'm going to skycity for job experience, boooo. I don't really want to do that part, but eh. I think I'm just scared cuz I got put on night shift. D:

Artwise I haven't been doing so much because I'm away most of the day, but luckily it's a long weekend so I might come out with something then. <3

In slightly more depressing news my mom has told me she wants to see rent money, which I really don't have. Wtf mother. D: I could just try to ignore her, but then she'll get really angry and hate me until she pays her bills. YAY.

THIS JOURNAL IS SO JUMBLED. I don't write so great when I just  get up. XD 
TOODLES KIDS.

I can NEVER think of a damn title for these journals.
Well, today was interesting.. To start the day off, I... got into a big fight with my mother, and I made her cry. I didn't feel bad at the time, but fuck I do now. Damn, it was like looking at a mirror the whole fucking argument. Seriously. She reminds me so much of.... me. But anyway, I apologized and made things right with her before me and Seb went off for a walk to buy things.

On the way, we found a Worrset! Randomly on the street, so we followed her since we weren't doing much. :3 After that we did our usual grocery shopping and cleaning. Still need to move the table out, to make room for the new one tomorrow... Fail. It's late and I shouldn't have left it this long.

Another thing that happened, was dad's computer crapped out completely. So Seb helped him get all his files off the hard drive, which was very nice of him. C: But it got a bit annoying, 'cause my dad is the sort of person who comes back every few minutes to be all buddy buddy and talk if he thinks you're really good friends.... Which resulted in him barging in while we were in compromising positions. XD (With clothing on, incase you thought otherwise. I would've died if it was... y'know.)

All in all it started out bad 'cause of mom but it's okay now. Hopefully today will be better. More cleaning!! I'm excited for the new dining set!!

Just got back from Christmas at the boyfriends parents' place out in the middle of NOWHERE! For nowhere it was pretty awesome, and they even got me a present... which I totally wasn't expecting. <3
I brung my Kittysuit with me, which was very amusing. I originally was too nervous to get any photos, but people loooooooooved it so that's okay. I got some photos here;
( Said photos here )

In other news, I saw HP 7 a few days ago and only just decided to write about it. It was alright. Not really anything special, the Potter movies have sort of died for me. I think what made the movie was The Three Brothers story. I have a page here if anybody is interested in concept art; http://visualtinkerings.blogspot.com/
Overall it was bearable, and I liked some aspects of it for sure. I do need to read the books again however, because my memory had gotten pretty bad I realized XD Will see part 2 though..

Anyway that's all for now kiddies!

So, this years con was neat while I was there. Unfortunately somebody close to me sort of... got kicked out on the second night. I was very upset to say the least, but what do you do? Stay back or follow your man? To be completely honest, I wish I just let him go back himself, because I was having fun. I don't feel bad about posting this either, 'cause he knows, and it's not like he actually goes on LJ anyway...
I think I'm most bummed about the fact I missed the photoshoot. Hopefully next year's one is better.

In other news... I got a new laptop, so I'm currently working on moving to it. :3

( Might be TMI for some. )

IN OTHER NEWS. Well, there isn't none. My life is so boring. :3 But I've almost cleared off my commissions, and since the interest stopped I can draw lots of personal stuff and gifts for people now.

Not really much to say. Seb and I got a new couch set today... Which was weird. O shit, first couple decision. My mom is pretty over the moon about it though, seeing as she'll probably end up using it more than we will. :P

In other news, thinking of things I could wear while in-suit.... You see it a lot, female (*cough*WHORE*cough*) suits in outfits, but you rarely see actual girls in suits in outfits. Of course, just a partial suit works too. Then I can wear what I want!

I haven't been posting WIP's lately, because I just don't have any. I'm currently doing the Iron Artist project, and for those I'm not bothering taking screenies or anything because I'm getting through them really, really fast. At least for me... I can do like two a day.  So that's why there's nothing on here right now. >: